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Matt Damon Has Some Real Frustrating Things To Say About Sexual Assault

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Photo by Scott Kowalchyk/CBS via Getty Images

*all women sigh collectively*

Actor Matt Damon offered his two cents on the current reckoning facing powerful men who've been accused of committing sexual assault, and a lot of people wish he'd just kept it to himself. In an interview with Peter Travers, the actor offered up some really frustrating opinions on sexual misconduct and how it should be handled. Basically, he and his friends are innocent and should lawyer up, and we need to go easy on comedian Louis C.K.

“I do believe that there’s a spectrum of behavior,” Damon said. “And we’re going to have to figure—you know, there’s a difference between, you know, patting someone on the butt and rape or child molestation, right? Both of those behaviors need to be confronted and eradicated without question, but they shouldn’t be conflated, right?”

To be clear, I don't think anyone ever said patting someone on the butt is the same as child molestation, unless that person is a child. “All of that behavior needs to be confronted, but there is a continuum," he said. "And on this end of the continuum where you have rape and child molestation or whatever, you know, that’s prison. Right? And that’s what needs to happen. Okay? And then we can talk about rehabilitation and everything else. That’s criminal behavior, and it needs to be dealt with that way. The other stuff is just kind of shameful and gross.”

Basically, if you don't rape someone in Damon's world, you should just be punished by knowing that you're gross. For instance, he thinks everyone was too harsh on C.K. "The Louis C.K. thing, I don’t know all the details. I don’t do deep dives on this, but I did see his statement, which kind of, which [was] arresting to me," he said. "When he came out and said, 'I did this. I did these things. These women are all telling the truth.' And I just remember thinking, 'Well, that’s the sign of somebody who—well, we can work with that.'" 

Damon is probably the only person who was impressed with C.K.'s statement, which completely omitted the words "I'm sorry." Also, if you "don't do deep dives on this," maybe don't talk about it to the press? Because maybe you don't know what you're talking about? Just a thought. "I don’t know Louis C.K... I’ve never met him," he continued, "I’m a fan of his, but I don’t imagine he’s going to do those things again. You know what I mean? I imagine the price that he’s paid at this point is so beyond anything that he—I just think that we have to kind of start delineating between what these behaviors are."

When it came to Al Franken, Damon said he "would have preferred if they had an Ethics Committee investigation," he said, adding:

It’s like at what point—you know, we’re so energized to kind of get retribution, I think. When you see Al Franken taking a picture putting his hands on that woman’s flak jacket and mugging for the camera, going like that, you know, that is just like a terrible joke, and it’s not funny. It’s wrong, and he shouldn’t have done that… But when you talk about Harvey [Weinstein] and what he’s accused of, there are no pictures of that. He knew he was up to no good. There’s no witnesses. There’s no pictures. There’s no braggadocio… So they don’t belong in the same category.

From a business standpoint, Damon said he agreed with director Scott Ridley on firing Kevin Spacey from his upcoming movie, All the Money in the World, after allegations came out that he sexually abused a teen. "That was smart," he said. "That was a total business decision by Ridley. I haven’t talked to him, but… it wasn’t a creative choice for Ridley. Ridley has a big movie coming out… and nobody right now is in the mood to see a Kevin Spacey movie… And I don’t disagree with his decision to do that. I mean, that movie, I think, will do much better without Kevin in it." 

When it came to Weinstein, Damon basically played dumb. "Nobody who made movies for him knew," he said of rape allegations against Weinstein. Even though he did admit Ben Affleck told him about Weinstein sexually harassing Gwyneth Paltrow.

Any human being would have put a stop to that, no matter who he was. They would’ve said absolutely no. You know what I mean?… I knew I wouldn’t want him married to anyone close to me. But that was the extent of what we knew, you know? And that wasn’t a surprise to anybody. So when you hear Harvey this, Harvey that — I mean, look at the guy. Of course he’s a womanizer… I mean, I don’t hang out with him.

And when it came to him or his friends, including Casey Affleck, being accused of sexual misconduct, Damon said, "It depends on what the accusation is," in terms of whether or not they should face punishment. He also said he'd lawyer up:

Ten years ago, you made a claim against me and I had a big movie coming out, okay? I have $100 million or I have a movie that is personally important to me coming out, and close to the release of that film, you say, "Matt Damon grabbed my butt and stuck his tongue down my throat." We would then go to mediation and organize a settlement. I’d go, "I don’t want this out there. Peter’s going to go out and talk to the press and run his mouth, and it’s going to be overshadowing the opening of this movie. How much money do you want?" The lawyers would get together, and they do this cost-benefit analysis, and they’d go, "Oh, this is what it’s worth." And I look at the number and go, "Okay, I’ll pay it, but you can never talk about this again. You’re fucking lying about this, but never talk about this again."

Um. Okay. It's really sad we live a world where men grabbing butts and shoving their tongues down women's throats is so common that they actually have a game plan ready to go for when they're accused of it. We also don't need to compare the various accusations. C.K. should face punishment for masturbating in front of women without consent, Weinstein should face punishment for raping women. There's no need to make a definitive ranking of all the toxic men of 2017. 

All to say, keep your opinions to yourself, Damon.

Photo by Imani Givertz

Premiering today via NYLON

Small Talks, aka Cayley Spivey, has come a long way since starting a band, then becoming the entire band herself and forging her own fan base from the ground up. On her recent album A Conversation Between Us, she began to unpack any lingering baggage with one particular song: "Teeth." Today, she premieres the accompanying music video exclusively via NYLON.

"'Teeth' is about my personal battle with letting go of the past," Spivey tells NYLON, admitting that it's easily her favorite song off of A Conversation Between Us.

Watch the video for "Teeth" below.

Small Talks - Teeth (Official Music Video) - YouTube www.youtube.com

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Photos by Joe Maher/Getty Images, Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for TIME

Must have been pretty awkward

Taylor Swift and Sophie Turner were guests on the U.K.'s The Graham Norton Show together, which must have been awkward for Turner's husband, Joe Jonas, seeing as he also happens to be Swift's ex. I wonder if his name came up?

The interview doesn't come out until Friday night, but promotional photos show the two sharing a couch. Swift is making an appearance to perform her new single, "ME!" while Turner is promoting her new film, X- Men: Dark Phoenix. But it seems necessary for the two to be asked about Jonas.

Swift was just on the Ellen DeGeneres Show earlier this month, where she brought up the fact that she felt bad for putting Jonas "on blast" on DeGeneres' show back in 2008 by telling the audience that he broke up with her in a record-setting short phone call. But, according to Swift, she and Jonas are chill now, since it happened pretty long ago, which means she's probably already hung out with Turner and maybe even gossiped about him with her.

We can only hope that they get the chance to spill some tea on television.

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Screenshot via YouTube, Photo Courtesy of HBO

"That's! His! Auntie!"

Leslie Jones has rewatched the Game of Thrones finale with a beer in hand, Seth Meyers at her side, and a full camera crew ready to take in all her glorious reactions. Spoilers ahead, but, if you haven't watched last week's episode already, that's kind of on you at this point.

When Jon Snow started to make out with Daenerys, also known as his aunt, only to stab her through the chest moments later, it was emotional whiplash for everyone watching. And, Jones' reactions—both from her first and second viewing—sum it all perfectly.

"That's! His! Auntie! [gagging noises]," Jones says before making an aside about calling the police if her uncle ever tried to do the same. But then the knife goes in, and Jones screams. "Did you see that?!" Jones asks, "Yeah bitch, that's a knife in you." Meyers points out the funniest part of all: "Why are you so upset about someone kissing their aunt but totally fine with someone killing their aunt?" Jones replies, "Because that bitch needed to go," and, well, same.

Other highlights from the comedians' rewatch include comparing Dany's victory speech to a bad improv gig, predicting that their dogs would have less of a reaction to their deaths than Drogon did to his mother's, and more.

Watch all of Jones' reactions from this Late Night clip below.

Game of Jones: Leslie Jones and Seth Watch Game of Thrones' Series Finale youtu.be

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These lyrics are a lot

Robbie Tripp, aka Curvy Wife Guy, is back with a music video, titled "Chubby Sexy," starring his wife and a trio of models. In it, Tripp raps about his bold choice to find women with an average body size attractive.

The video begins with a series of statements laid over some pool water: "Curves are the new high fashion," "Chubby is the new sexy," "We Out Here." Tripp posits that these queens deserve an anthem, which they do. What they do not deserve is this Cursed Song. As he lists all the names he knows to call them by (thick, thicc, and BBW), one model (who I really, really hope was paid well) squirts some lotion down her cleavage, and Tripp begins dancing.

"My girl chubby sexy/ Call her bonita gordita," Tripp states in his chorus, before going on to compare "big booty meat" to the peach emoji. Another thing he mentions is that his wife can't find a belt that fits her waist, and that's why he calls her James and the Giant Peach. He then tries to dab. Here are some of the other Cursed highlights from his, uh, verses:

Got those Khaleesi curves/ Knows how to dragon slay
She like a dude that's woke/ We like a girl that's weighty
Some say a chubby girl that's risky/ But they ain't met a curvy girl that's frisky
Imma dunk that donk like I'm Andrew Wiggins.
Thick like an Amazon/ Built like Big Ben.

Tripp says one thing in the video that I couldn't agree more with: "She don't need a man." No, she does not. Please run. If you must, watch the entire video, below. Or send it to your nemesis!

Robbie Tripp - Chubby Sexy (Official Music Video) www.youtube.com

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Photo by Emma McIntyre / Getty Images.

See the promo here

It was bound to happen. The Kadashians and Jenners have committed themselves to letting the cameras roll on their lives, for better or for worse. So if you thought that the Jordyn Woods and Tristan Thompson cheating scandal was off limits, you thought wrong. The trailer for Sunday's episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians was just released, and it involves the famous family working through the fallout of what happened when Woods went to a party at Thompson's house.

The teaser includes the infamous clip of Khloé Kardashian screaming "LIAAAARRRRRR." It's still not explicitly clear who prompted that strong response. She could be responding to Thompson, who clearly isn't always honest. Or she could be reacting to Woods account of the events on Red Table Talk. But the most revealing moment comes when we see Kylie Jenner—who was Woods' best friend before all of this happened—react for the first time.

In a heart-to-heart conversation, momager Kris Jenner says, "For you and Jordyn, it's like a divorce." Kylie only offers this in response: "She fucked up." Based on Woods' version of events—which I'm inclined to believeThompson is the one who fucked up. Still, I'm hoping for some kind of reconciliation between the two longtime friends. Perhaps we'll have to wait until next season for that.

Check out the promo video below.

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