Stephen Colbert And Run The Jewels Just Wrote Your New Favorite NSFW Holiday Song

Ho ho ho ho sheeple, wake the fuck up

by Lisa Eppich

Stephen Colbert and rap duo Run the Jewels have collaborated on a new holiday song that's just as awesome—and lewd—as their other classic tune, "The Halloween Wiggle."

In their new Christmas tune, called "Jingle Jingle (Santa Party)," Colbert's earnest attempts to bring the family together around some good ol' mirth and merriment get constantly overridden by Killer Mike and El-P, who would rather expose the ills that are plaguing our country and preventing a large percentage of citizens from having the safe and comfortable life Colbert projects.

"Jingle Jingle (Santa Party)" is a true ear worm, and you will possibly resent that a little part of your brain will have it on repeat for the rest of the weekend. The video's juxtaposition of Colbert's cliche Christmas scenes, complete with garish decorations, chunky knit sweaters, and pleas to "be nice, it's the holidays," with Run the Jewels' scenes, which all take place in an urban setting and are filmed in black-and-white, is effectively jarring. As the song progresses, Colbert implores Run the Jewels to embrace the "Christmas Spirit" and forget about the world's woes for a little while, saying things like "we can deal with these issues in 2018." To which, of course, RtJ says, "Well let me break it down for how your stockings getting stuffed: White kids getting presents, black kids getting cuffed." And then there's the helpful reminder that: "Santa’s my bitch, creepy cracker-ass witch/ Quit spying on the kids, you a perv, eat shit."

Eventually, Colbert's cheerful family decide to leave their patriarch and join Killer Mike and El-P, leaving Colbert alone and despondent. Hell, even grandma gets a kick out of lighting a Christmas tree on fire.

But in the end, Colbert finally joins the crew and tries to "rap his truth" in the stilted way only a middle-aged white guy can. And... well, it's a little too much for everyone.

Check out the full version of "Jingle Jingle (Santa Party)" below, and try to get away with playing it at your family gathering this holiday season.