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Every Living Character On 'Game Of Thrones,' Ranked From Worst To Best

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Photo courtesy of HBO.

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We've made it through two episodes in the final season of Game of Thrones without any major casualties. This won't be the case for much longer, and we shouldn't take it for granted. The army of the dead is literally at Winterfell's door, plus life isn't nearly as precious as power in the HBO series. We need to bring our favorite (and least favorite characters) their flowers while they're still around to smell them. It wouldn't be right to let our remaining characters perish without first acknowledging who was the best and worst amongst them.

So I'm here to rank the surviving characters that are left—and yes, I am ready to argue (even though I'm right).

Jon Snow

Photo courtesy of HBO.

This may be an unpopular opinion with anyone who is attracted to slick hair and constant angst, but Jon Snow is actually the most annoying character on Game of Thrones. Melisandre should have worked her light magic to bring Hodor back from the dead, instead. What frustrates me the most about Jon is that, despite everything he's been through, he still thinks he has the luxury of being naive. Yes, he's *hOnOrAbLe*, but he is extremely lacking in the common sense department. If Ned Stark had to die for his honor, Jon should go, too.

Euron Greyjoy

Photo courtesy of HBO

First of all, Euron's post-coital etiquette is tacky. Before he could even get his trousers back on, he was demanding Cersei tell him how good he was compared to her other lovers. That's a lot of nerve for someone who couldn't even get Cersei elephants for her army. We've seen characters with better reasons for having so much confidence come and go (RIP Prince Oberyn), and Euron isn't anything special. Also, we can't trust anyone who would ruthlessly go against their own family, like he did with Yara and Theon.

Theon Greyjoy

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Speaking of Theon, I still hate him, too. I don't care that he lost his dick and some of his finger meat at the hands of Ramsey Bolton. He should have paid with his life for what he did to the Starks. End of story. He's dead weight and unfit for anything. I hope he's the first to go in the Battle of Winterfell.

Yara Greyjoy

Photo courtesy of HBO.

I might be a bad feminist for this, but I'm not a fan of Yara Greyjoy, either. Despite being a queer woman, she's a little too comfortable with the codes of the bad boy club she was raised in. Plus, she has only ever cared about the Iron Islands, which is where she's headed now. Sis, I just don't have time to be happy for you and that pile of rocks right now when night of the living dead is actually upon us. Throw the whole Greyjoy house away.

Ser Jorah Mormont

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Ser Jorah Mormont is one of those characters who really exists to make everyone around him look good. Samwell was the hero after treating Jorah's greyscale. Tyrion became hand of the queen, after Ser Jorah brought him to Daenerys, and Tyrion won this accolade despite Ser Jorah being right. there. the. whole. time. Furthermore, Ser Jorah is kind of the Drake of Game of Thrones, in that he thinks his nice guy act will one day win him Daenerys' heart. But it's not going to happen. Men who can't move on from rejection—even soft, friendly rejections—make me uncomfortable.

Jaime Lannister

Photo courtesy of HBO.

No, Jaime is not the same person he was when he pushed Bran out of a window in Season 1. However, he hasn't changed for the better on his own, and it took him a really long time to move to the right side of history (and, you know, fall out of love with his sister). There just isn't any honor in that. I know many fans, and probably the Game of Thrones showrunners think Jamie is profoundly interesting. But to me, he's just a rich white dude from a monied family, who's been afforded an existential crisis about his place in the world. You can find that on any corner in Williamsburg, Brooklyn.

Gilly

Photo courtesy of HBO.

I want more for Gilly because she's survived so much—including her incestuous father (and the father to her son), Craster. She also takes good care of her baby, Sam, and is extremely maternal to children who aren't hers. But we don't need mommies right now. If she can't wield a sword, share some vital information, or help with war strategy, she's dead weight. If Sam isn't careful, she could very easily hold him back at a pivotal moment.

Sansa Stark

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Sansa has survived. She's done a hell of a job surviving. But that's all she's done, and it wouldn't have happened without the skills of other people around her. She has come out on the other side, a little wiser and less quick to trust other people, but it's hard to rally behind her when so many other characters have really earned their stripes. Sansa has learned the game, but she's still not ready to play it. She's also the reason Ned is dead.

Gendry

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Gendry can confidently say that he was the key to Arya's sexual awakening… even if it was her awakening to the fact that she actually prefers women. Gendry is cute, but he's not all that, and I need someone who is offering more than a buzzcut and strong biceps to this story right now.

Bronn

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Ever in search of his next paycheck, Bronn is the City Girl of the show. His catchphrase should literally be, "Where da bag at?" He's also really funny—not unlike Tyrion, but taller. Unfortunately, his constant pursuit of cash makes him unreliable and untrustworthy.

Podrick Payne

That's Pod in the back.

Photo courtesy of HBO.

The only reason Podrick isn't higher on the list is because we haven't seen much of him. But the Yelp reviews on his dick game, his amazing singing voice, and the fact that he's survived this long despite only learning how to ride a horse last week are so impressive.

Grey Worm

Photo courtesy of HBO.

I love Grey Worm, and I appreciate his enthusiastic interest in the art of cunnilingus. He is also fiercely protective of Daenerys and has been transformed by his love for Missandei. He's such a precious character that his downfall is almost inevitable. I can only hope that he and his love die together, because I can't bear to watch Missandei have to mourn him.

Bran Stark

Photo courtesy of HBO.

I want to like Bran so much more than I do. He has a brand-new job as the three-eyed raven, which basically makes him the keeper of all teas. But it's hard to love him because he's just so weird now. He doesn't even identify as Bran Stark anymore, and I'm suspicious that he already knows everyone is going to die, but just won't tell them.

Ser Davos Seaworth

Photo courtesy of HBO

The Onion Knight is the definition of a thoroughbred. I'm at ease whenever he's on the screen because I know he's going to have solid, good advice that makes sense and is in the best interest of the entire realm. He's one of the most reliable characters in the show, made wiser by age.

Missandei

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Everyone knows that Missandei is the real hand of the queen. She's more than a servant to Daenerys: She's smart, insightful, and strategic. She's the best friend we all need on our teams. I just wish they gave her more screen time.

Melisandre

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Kicking off my top 10 is the Red Priestess. Sis has the range: She's a seductress, a war strategist, a magical being, and committed to fulfilling both missions and prophecies. She has the full package necessary to survive the craziness of Westeros and the long night.

Tormund Giantsbane

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Tormund comes through dripping in superhuman strength and charisma every time he hits the screen. I love that he's stayed true to himself even as he went from wildling opposition to brother amongst the fancy folks south of the wall. Most recently, he's made me uncomfortable crossing boundaries in his pursuit of Brienne, but I know she can hold her own and will probably be putting him in his place, if they survive the Battle of Winterfell.

Varys

Photo courtesy of HBO.

He could give Bran a run for his money in the secrets department, but Varys is more likable because he makes having secrets look so much cooler. Varys comes and goes like a mist, popping up across seas to be of assistance to whichever monarch he has the most faith in. It's still unclear to me whether or not his moves are motivated by power or morality, but I crave more scenes with him in it to find out the answer.

Samwell Tarley

Photo courtesy of HBO.

He grew up right before my eyes. Sam has gone from chubby Night's Watch reject to guerilla maester. He's Neville Longbottom, more valuable than we thought he would be when all of this first started. He is the character who I am irrationally invested in. It's going to tear me apart when he dies.

Brienne of Tarth

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Excuse me, Ser Brienne of Tarth. Our girl is a knight now! And she deserves it, damnit. She's fought off men, ghosts, Jamie's ego, Tormund's advances, and now she's about to face the walking dead. Brienne made sure Sansa was safe and kept her promise to Lady Catelyn until the very end. She is going to die with honor and make us all proud.

Lyanna Mormont

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Small but mighty enough to steal every single scene she's in, Lyanna Mormont knows exactly what she's doing. If Cersei was smart, she'd keep her eyes on this northern lady at all times. If she's this fierce now, imagine what she'll be capable of when she turns 18.

The Hound

Photo courtesy of HBO.

For the men and women who aren't cushioned by high-ranking families, it's grit, tenacity, and resilience that keep them going. You keep living until you die. The Hound lives with this acceptance. He's questioned his own faith and morality, but he's not going to give any of it power over his survival. The Hound doesn't hold grudges anymore—except maybe against his brother—but he's also not backing down. His motto is: It is what it is.

Tyrion Lannister

Photo courtesy of HBO.

You can't help but love Tyrion, try as you may to hate him. He drinks in moments of crisis. He killed his own father while Lord Tywin sat on the toilet. He killed his girlfriend for breaking his heart. But Tyrion sees the bigger picture—which includes saving the world from zombies and saving the remaining Lannisters from themselves. Tyrion has redeemed himself over and over again, delivering stinging one-liners at every turn. We really hope he gets his wish to die in his bed at age 80 with a belly full of wine and, well, some other stuff.

Arya Stark

Photo courtesy of HBO.

My top three characters are all eligible for the number one spot, and yes, they're all women. Arya has proven herself a formidable foe to all of her enemies, and a powerful equal to her lover Gendry. The youngest Stark daughter's evolution from little girl to young woman has been full of adventure, heartbreak, isolation, and redemption. She's consistently the most satisfying character to watch. Even as someone who isn't in the running to sit on the throne, I think her chances of survival after the Battle of Winterfell are strong.

Cersei Lannister

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Money, power, respect—Cersei has nurtured and cultivated all these qualities. Her methods to attain and maintain these things have been unconscionable, and she's suffered greatly in her pursuit: She's lost all three of her children, she had to undergo a humiliating public atonement, and she had to have sex with both Robert Baratheon and Euron Greyjoy. True, Cersei has stepped into mad queen territory, but she's one of the most dynamic and interesting characters as a result. I can't wait for her to die, but I am really going to really miss her when she does.

Daenerys Targaryen

Photo courtesy of HBO.

Anyone who doesn't acknowledge that Daenerys is one of the best characters on this show is... clearly not watching this show. Daenerys is no longer just the uncomplicated victim that she was when we started this journey, easy to root for because she rose above adversity. She is THAT bitch, for better or for worse. She's worked too hard to turn her back on her claim to the throne, but she's not so laser-focused on being Queen that she'll ignore the deadly threats from north of the Wall. She's not above burning some human bridges, though. Daenerys is complex; she's given us some of the best kill scenes and most endearing and tender moments. She was the apple of Khal Drogo's eye and is the mother of dragons. I stan.

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Screenshot via YouTube

And I need to see the rest ASAP

As excited as we already are for Olivia Wilde's directorial debut, Booksmart, to hit theaters next week, we just got even more desperate to see it. Why? Well, the first six minutes of the film were just released, and every minute is incredible.

The film opens on Molly (Beanie Feldstein) meditating and listening to a motivational tape telling her she's better than everyone else, and to "fuck those losers." Her room is decorated with pictures of Michelle Obama and RBG, so we know her head is in the right place. We learn she's the class president when she arrives at school with her best friend, Amy (Kaitlyn Dever).

It's there that we get a glimpse of the social hierarchy in which Molly and Amy exist—but somewhere down near the bottom, way below the popular kids, the theater nerds, the stoners, and even the annoying class clown.

The film officially hits theaters on May 23, but Annapurna Pictures is holding advanced screenings across the country today, May 17—we're actually holding two of them! So, if you're in L.A. or New York, check them out.

But also, you can watch the first six minutes of the film, below, and prepare yourself to watch the whole movie in a week.

BOOKSMART | Uncut First 6 Minutes www.youtube.com

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Photo by Rich Polk/ Getty

Her hypocrisy would be mind-blowing if it weren't so predictable

It's been just over two years since Tomi Lahren appeared on ABC's The View to assert that, despite her ultra-conservative bona fides, she holds one position more normally associated with the left wing: She's pro-choice. In that talk show appearance, Lahren made clear then that her pro-choice views were consonant with her self-identification as a "constitutionalist," further explaining:

I am someone that's for limited government. So I can't sit here and be a hypocrite and say I'm for limited government but I think the government should decide what women should do with their bodies." I can sit here and say that as a Republican, and I can say, "You know what? I'm for limited government, so stay out of my guns, and you can stay out of my body as well."

Back then, we noted the hypocrisy inherent to that position, since Lahren was an ardent supporter of President Trump—who made no secret of his desire to appoint anti-abortion judges to the Supreme Court and other judicial benches—and Vice-President Pence, whose anti-abortion views are even more ardent.

Since Lahren's appearance on The View, she has appeared in the anti-abortion film Roe v. WadeRoe v. Wade, which co-starred fellow execrable conservative troll, Milo Yiannopoulos, and, um, Joey Lawrence. Though the film has not yet been released, it is alleged to contain "several graphic scenes depicting aborted fetuses," and also the acting styles of Jamie Kennedy, so we're not sure for whom it will really be appropriate.

But while Lahren's role in that film would be enough to make anyone question just how committed she is to her alleged pro-choice stance, the recent news about de facto abortion bans in Alabama and Georgia has incited Lahren to speak out about her views once again.

On Twitter, Lahren opened herself up to "attack[s] by [her] fellow conservatives" and spoke out against the Alabama abortion ban as being "too restrictive." And, indeed, her "fellow conservatives" did quickly attack Lahren for not actually caring about human life, and for having too liberal a position on whether or not a woman should be forced to continue a pregnancy that resulted from rape. But then also, as Lahren must have known would happen, other people supported her for... not having one irredeemably monstrous position amongst her arsenal of irredeemably monstrous positions.

But, let's be clear: Tomi Lahren is not—no matter what she tweets—pro-choice, and neither is any supporter of the Republican Party. There is no doubt that there are Republicans who are in favor of safe access to abortion—particularly when it comes to themselves and their family members having said access. But by supporting the Republican Party, they are showing how little it actually matters to them, and showing what it is that they really prioritize over women's safety and freedom: namely, access to guns, bigoted immigration policies, the continued disenfranchisement of voters across the country. I could go on, but there's no need.

Lahren's tweet doesn't reveal in any way that she's an advocate for women's rights, all it reveals is her hypocrisy and that of anyone (Meghan McCain, hi), who would love to have a world created specifically for their needs, and who is willing to sacrifice the rights of the less privileged in order to secure their own. It is despicable and dangerous and incredibly predictable. But, at least, it might give Lahren something to talk about on the red carpet with her fellow anti-abortion movie costars, if that film ever gets more than a straight-to-video release.

If you want to find out how to help women have access to abortion, please visit here for information about donating and volunteering.

Diplo, Vince Staples, and Rico Nasty also appear

Lil Nas X went all out with the visuals for his hit "Old Town Road," tapping all of his newfound collaborators and friends, like Billy Ray Cyrus, Diplo, Vince Staples, and Rico Nasty, to star. The movie travels from 1889 Wild Wild West to the modern-day city outskirts, so saddle up and come along for the ride.

As the visuals start, Nas and Cyrus gallop away with a bag of loot, obviously having pulled off a heist. The trio of men on horseback that were in pursuit of them come to a halt, unable to catch up, and Chris Rock—the leader of the group—states, "When you see a Black man on a horse going that fast, you just gotta let him fly." Just as Nas and Cyrus think they're able to relax in stranger's home, it turns out the homeowner isn't so friendly. Nas jumps into a hole to escape, only to end up hundreds of years in the future on the other side.

Forget trying to figure out the logistics of time travel, and just embrace the hilarity of Nas' horse also having wound up there, and in peak racing condition. He impresses the locals not only in the race (with Vince Staples losing money in a bet against him) but with his sweet square dancing skills. Once he and Cyrus (yes, he time traveled too) trade out their old-timey duds for some fresh, rhinestone-adorned outfits, they enter a room playing bingo with Rico Nasty in it. Diplo is playing the washboard, I feel like I'm losing my mind, and this is probably the best music video I've watched this year.

Watch the movie for "Old Town Road" again and again, below.

Lil Nas X - Old Town Road (Official Movie) ft. Billy Ray Cyrus www.youtube.com

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Screenshot via YouTube

They really "don't care" about how this was edited, do they?

Ed Sheeran and Justin Bieber used the name of their song as inspiration for the "I Don't Care" music video, and have presented what is essentially a long blooper reel of the pair messing around with a green screen.

The visuals show how dedicated the two are to proving just how much they don't care, because I'm pretty sure they did the editing on this video as well. They dance around in costumes, as an ice cream cone, a panda, a teddy bear, and more. I have a clear vision of Bieber and Sheeran raiding a costume shop just an hour before setting up a tripod and going to town on this one. They also juxtapose their faces on top of a ballerina, a skydiver, and a corn inside the husk.

Blink, and you'll miss the funniest moment of all in the video: Ed Sheeran gets married to a cardboard cutout of a young Bieber with swoopy hair.

Watch the visuals for "I Don't Care" below.

Ed Sheeran & Justin Bieber - I Don't Care [Official Video] youtu.be

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Photo by Jena Cumbo

Her new LP, 'Take Me to the Disco,' is her most personal work yet

Meg Myers isn't afraid to admit she's still figuring out who she wants to be. Originally from Tennessee, Myers moved to Los Angeles at the age of 19 to dedicate her life to her music career. In 2012, she released her first EP, Daughter in the Choir, which set the groundwork for the releases of Sorry (2015) and Take Me to the Disco (2018). Well-known for her poetic lyrics, crude vocals, and cover of Kate Bush's "Running Up That Hill," the honest singer-songwriter makes a point to tell me that self-acceptance is a process. After listening to her deeply personal LP, Take Me to the Disco, I know she's not wrong.

In the middle of producing her new forthcoming music, the star opens up to NYLON: "I've always been able to channel [more painful moments in life] into my art. Music always stood out to me as the easiest way to capture all the emotions at once in one piece. Music for me is wild and free." It's clear that it is this fearlessness to self-reflect that not only makes her body of work so authentic but also what motivates her to continue to grow.

Below, we speak with Myers about her new music, self-love, and her ever-evolving relationship with creativity.

The Great Eros Pants, Chae New York top, Schutz shoes, and Via Saviene rings. Photos by Jena Cumbo

How did moving to Los Angeles influence the artist you are today?
I feel more safe here. I've been tapping more into my truth and expressing myself on a deeper level here. Growing up, my family was very chaotic, and I never knew what was about to happen. I have four brothers and a sister, and we grew up basically as best friends, making fun out of the chaos and always creating some type of art from it. I've always been able to channel [more painful moments in life] into my art.

Music always stood out to me as the easiest way to capture all the emotions at once in one piece. Music for me is wild and free.

What are some of your biggest influences?
I think all the barbecue and shrimp and grits [in Tennessee] really adds a smokiness to my music.

My queerness gives me a lot of material to create with. It's allowing me to be more playful and not take every little thing so seriously.

Silk Laundry jumpsuit, Wild Vertigga T-shirt, and Nakamol earring.Photo by Jena Cumbo

Tell me about your new music. Why is it different than anything you've ever created?
This EP is going to have a lot of similar vibes to my last album, because I wrote it at the same time with the same producer about a lot of the same struggles and self-discoveries as my past music. I'll share more with you on my third album.

I'm such a fan of your cover of Kate Bush's "Running Up That Hill." Why did you gravitate toward that song to cover?
It's such a powerful song! Kate Bush is magic. It's almost like I've been being guided to cover that song for a long time. I don't know how to explain it in words, as they can feel so limiting, and this song is beyond words to me. It's just a deep inner knowing, and it makes my heart flutter.


Chae NewYork blazer; Saku top, The Great Eros bottoms, and Inch2 boots.Photo by Jena Cumbo

Are there any other songs you feel really connected to?
I would love to collaborate with Active Child. The songs "Hanging On" and "Johnny Belinda" are also otherworldly to me. I've been listening to this band called Walk the Moon a lot. I also love Phoebe Bridgers. I have a crush on her. I generally listen to instrumental music and classical. If you look up 432hz music, it's incredibly healing, and solfeggio frequencies have helped me with a lot.

What does self-love mean to you?
It's been a process for me. It's been quite the journey. Right now, I would say [self-love for me] is about accepting myself, and having love for all the experiences that have led me to where I am. It also means being grateful for growth. It's also been about learning to be in the present moment. It's been learning to trust myself and not listening to what others think I need to be doing. As I learn to do this, I also learn how to love others deeper. All this being said, it's a process.

Chae New York blazer and Saku top.Photo by Jena Cumbo

What advice do you have for someone struggling to find happiness right now?
Spend some time in solitude if you can, or with a really safe person who you feel you can express yourself freely with. Find someone who has no expectations of you and is supportive. In that present moment, ask yourself, What feels good to you? What do you feel like doing? Use your imagination. Daydream. Find what it is you enjoy doing. I promise you can unlock magic inside yourself. It just takes patience.

*This interview has been condensed and edited for clarity.

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