I Tried The Moon Juice Skin-Care Line And Am Still Waiting To Become Superhuman

Skin Care

It hasn't happened yet, but... any day now?

A friend recently told me that she hates a popular skin-care line that you've probably seen all over the internet (I'm not going to shade them here, because, who needs that? Who cares? But, you know them). But, even though she's never seen a difference in her skin, she keeps buying it because she loves the marketing. I heard this and I thought, That is so real. And also: That is how I feel about the Moon Juice skin-care line.

For those unfamiliar with the brand, Moon Juice was founded in L.A. (where else) by Amanda Chantal Bacon, and became famous for products like Sex Dust, a supplement that promises to help your sex life; she also put out a cookbook. The skin-care line, which launched last summer, feels like a natural extension, since it includes similarly esoteric ingredients to Bacon's existing supplement products. And just like with Sex Dust, there's plenty to be curious about, like the Beauty Shroom Plumping Jelly Serum, which sounds like it comes with a hacky sack and tragically does not. (And, no, it doesn't come with a Grateful Dead wall hanging either—trust me I asked.) But you can BYOLL (bring your own lava lamp). Okay, I swear I'm done with shroom jokes for now.

Anyway, the entire line is premised on the magic properties of mushrooms, and this particular product boasts that "silver ear mushroom and hyaluronic acid join forces with nutrient dense reishi to help enhance skin elasticity and help reduce the signs of inflammation. The light, jelly texture works deep within the skin's surface to visibly reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles while creating a lasting hydration barrier for super supple skin with resilience and bounce." Okay, then.

I found that the texture of the serum is very "what slugs leak," so if you like slug-leak textures, you'll enjoy this (which maybe you do, because snail mucus products are very big right now). The first thing I noticed about the ingredients in the plumping jelly is that the first two are water and coconut oil and, well, coconut oil might work for some people, but it doesn't work for me—and this totally broke me out. A quick Google search told me many other people had the same reaction (though, of course, others didn't, because skin is complicated). Ultimately, though, I didn't notice any plumping, unless you count, "Oh hey, that breakout is PLUMP!"

There's also an Exfoliating Potion which has "potent AHA and BHA five-acid complex [that] features glycolic, lactic, and salicylic acid to help encourage natural cellular turnover, unclog and minimize the appearance of pores, and visibly reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles. Vitamin B3 pairs with adaptogenic reishi and tocotrienols to help boost hydration, combat the signs of oxidative stress, and fortify the skin's natural barrier." Which, thankfully, did not have coconut oil, so it was not a face-festival of "Am I 16? I feel 16." But since I couldn't really tell yet if it made a marked difference, I guess that's a sign that it didn't.

And yet, despite my complaints, I do think it's awesome that the line is so committed to being clean, since it is truly terrifying what's in most of our beauty products. Still though, using these products made me wonder the same things I've wondered about adaptogenic supplements lately: Are they really doing anything? And the conclusion I've come to is: I have no idea.

I guess the choice is, I can stop taking them, since I'd feel like I might be wasting huge piles of money on nothing; or, keep taking them thinking maybe they're doing nothing, but also wondering, What if they're making me superhuman and preparing for the inevitable apocalypse? The choice is mine—and yours. Me? I want to believe.

Photo by Imani Givertz

Premiering today via NYLON

Small Talks, aka Cayley Spivey, has come a long way since starting a band, then becoming the entire band herself and forging her own fan base from the ground up. On her recent album A Conversation Between Us, she began to unpack any lingering baggage with one particular song: "Teeth." Today, she premieres the accompanying music video exclusively via NYLON.

"'Teeth' is about my personal battle with letting go of the past," Spivey tells NYLON, admitting that it's easily her favorite song off of A Conversation Between Us.

Watch the video for "Teeth" below.

Small Talks - Teeth (Official Music Video) - YouTube

Photos by Joe Maher/Getty Images, Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for TIME

Must have been pretty awkward

Taylor Swift and Sophie Turner were guests on the U.K.'s The Graham Norton Show together, which must have been awkward for Turner's husband, Joe Jonas, seeing as he also happens to be Swift's ex. I wonder if his name came up?

The interview doesn't come out until Friday night, but promotional photos show the two sharing a couch. Swift is making an appearance to perform her new single, "ME!" while Turner is promoting her new film, X- Men: Dark Phoenix. But it seems necessary for the two to be asked about Jonas.

Swift was just on the Ellen DeGeneres Show earlier this month, where she brought up the fact that she felt bad for putting Jonas "on blast" on DeGeneres' show back in 2008 by telling the audience that he broke up with her in a record-setting short phone call. But, according to Swift, she and Jonas are chill now, since it happened pretty long ago, which means she's probably already hung out with Turner and maybe even gossiped about him with her.

We can only hope that they get the chance to spill some tea on television.

Screenshot via YouTube, Photo Courtesy of HBO

"That's! His! Auntie!"

Leslie Jones has rewatched the Game of Thrones finale with a beer in hand, Seth Meyers at her side, and a full camera crew ready to take in all her glorious reactions. Spoilers ahead, but, if you haven't watched last week's episode already, that's kind of on you at this point.

When Jon Snow started to make out with Daenerys, also known as his aunt, only to stab her through the chest moments later, it was emotional whiplash for everyone watching. And, Jones' reactions—both from her first and second viewing—sum it all perfectly.

"That's! His! Auntie! [gagging noises]," Jones says before making an aside about calling the police if her uncle ever tried to do the same. But then the knife goes in, and Jones screams. "Did you see that?!" Jones asks, "Yeah bitch, that's a knife in you." Meyers points out the funniest part of all: "Why are you so upset about someone kissing their aunt but totally fine with someone killing their aunt?" Jones replies, "Because that bitch needed to go," and, well, same.

Other highlights from the comedians' rewatch include comparing Dany's victory speech to a bad improv gig, predicting that their dogs would have less of a reaction to their deaths than Drogon did to his mother's, and more.

Watch all of Jones' reactions from this Late Night clip below.

Game of Jones: Leslie Jones and Seth Watch Game of Thrones' Series Finale

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These lyrics are a lot

Robbie Tripp, aka Curvy Wife Guy, is back with a music video, titled "Chubby Sexy," starring his wife and a trio of models. In it, Tripp raps about his bold choice to find women with an average body size attractive.

The video begins with a series of statements laid over some pool water: "Curves are the new high fashion," "Chubby is the new sexy," "We Out Here." Tripp posits that these queens deserve an anthem, which they do. What they do not deserve is this Cursed Song. As he lists all the names he knows to call them by (thick, thicc, and BBW), one model (who I really, really hope was paid well) squirts some lotion down her cleavage, and Tripp begins dancing.

"My girl chubby sexy/ Call her bonita gordita," Tripp states in his chorus, before going on to compare "big booty meat" to the peach emoji. Another thing he mentions is that his wife can't find a belt that fits her waist, and that's why he calls her James and the Giant Peach. He then tries to dab. Here are some of the other Cursed highlights from his, uh, verses:

Got those Khaleesi curves/ Knows how to dragon slay
She like a dude that's woke/ We like a girl that's weighty
Some say a chubby girl that's risky/ But they ain't met a curvy girl that's frisky
Imma dunk that donk like I'm Andrew Wiggins.
Thick like an Amazon/ Built like Big Ben.

Tripp says one thing in the video that I couldn't agree more with: "She don't need a man." No, she does not. Please run. If you must, watch the entire video, below. Or send it to your nemesis!

Robbie Tripp - Chubby Sexy (Official Music Video)

Photo by Emma McIntyre / Getty Images.

See the promo here

It was bound to happen. The Kadashians and Jenners have committed themselves to letting the cameras roll on their lives, for better or for worse. So if you thought that the Jordyn Woods and Tristan Thompson cheating scandal was off limits, you thought wrong. The trailer for Sunday's episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians was just released, and it involves the famous family working through the fallout of what happened when Woods went to a party at Thompson's house.

The teaser includes the infamous clip of Khloé Kardashian screaming "LIAAAARRRRRR." It's still not explicitly clear who prompted that strong response. She could be responding to Thompson, who clearly isn't always honest. Or she could be reacting to Woods account of the events on Red Table Talk. But the most revealing moment comes when we see Kylie Jenner—who was Woods' best friend before all of this happened—react for the first time.

In a heart-to-heart conversation, momager Kris Jenner says, "For you and Jordyn, it's like a divorce." Kylie only offers this in response: "She fucked up." Based on Woods' version of events—which I'm inclined to believeThompson is the one who fucked up. Still, I'm hoping for some kind of reconciliation between the two longtime friends. Perhaps we'll have to wait until next season for that.

Check out the promo video below.