Why You Feel So Weird This Valentine's Day


Let's look to the stars to explain

February is the shortest month, but it can also be the coldest and the hardest. And then there's Valentine's Day. It isn't easy for everyone, but it doesn't have to be hard either. For those of you who grew up immersed in the messaging of this national ritual, the circumstance of being single or the choice to be single can feel counter to the narrative of wholeness. These feeling are especially exacerbated as the Sun remains in noncommittal Aquarius and Mars grows hot in fight-y Aries. Air feeds fire, and fire aches to burn. Whether you want to burn bridges or burn with new passion in your heart, it's easy enough to respond with the phrase "I'm not just a half of a whole" to spurts of casual misogyny (since much of coupledom owes its lineage to hetero-patriarchy), but it can be hard to re-program our heavily impressionable spirits.

Action-oriented Mars in Aries grows irate with limitations on freedom (and the conjunction to irresponsible and individualistic Uranus doesn't help things one bit), but the Moon in Gemini is all about communication, connection, and trying out new positions—sexually, spiritually, politically, interpersonally. This past summer, my friend Karen—who is and was not single—screamed "Coupledom is the end of Dykedom" while walking the Dyke March alongside me, and I haven't been able to forget it.

Of course, coupledom has its pleasure. All exclusive forms of connection do. In many ways, for those of us who choose to walk the long road toward liberation beside another person, the work of singularity is just as valuable if not more so. Often, this work requires solitude but not always. Here, I remind you that one way to celebrate your singular spirit is to celebrate all the people in your life who walk (or ride) with you—romantic partners and otherwise.

Mercury has slid into Pisces, and while this transit doesn't make for very clear communication, I feel that, with the right intentions, it can deeply support an expansive and generous (if not diffuse) expression of love and affection. Mercury in Pisces knows that gifts mean more when they're personal, poems are powerful and music can be magic for someone's heart. Mercury in Pisces might draw you a bath and get in with you. Might wake you to go bird watching, and you'll hate it at first, but then you'll love it. With the Sun in Aquarius and Mercury in Pisces in the 11th house, your ability to see your impact beyond yourself is sparked and tried. Aquarius rules the 11th house, the house of friendship, while Pisces rules the 12th, house of self-undoing. Pisces might gasp at the weight of Aquarius' social contracts, but Aquarius glimmers with the momentary pleasure of adoring themselves through acts of adoring others.

Maybe all this glimmer talk has got you swimming in circles. When Venus is in Capricorn, she believes in walking it like you're talking it, and does so with a great deal of personal pride. While Venus in any other sign conjunct Saturn might have been a difficulty, Venus conjunct Saturn in Capricorn thrives under a good ethical challenge. She isn't boastful because her work speaks for itself and often but not always comes in the form of tangible results. Just the other day, I opened a box of offerings from Goddess Provisions with a sweet friend who has an Aries rising and Capricorn moon. We assembled a little crystal stand together and put an amethyst marble at the center. We ate beautiful chocolates and spritzed our hair with a spray that had in it pomegranate oil, calendula flowers, rose petals, silver fir needle, chamomile, lavender, and rosemary. The Pattern app said this friend makes me feel romantic, and it's true. What I'm saying is, every day there is opportunity for romance. The more we learn to recognize it between each other—as friends, as people who do not expect to "complete" each other—the more we cultivate our singular power in relationship and experience love everywhere.

Meanwhile, if you're curious about the myriad ways that each sign receives and expresses love, if you want to think through whether air signs (Libra, Gemini, Aquarius) love words of affirmation more than fire signs (Leo, Aries, Sagittarius), have I got news for you. This month, I launched an astro-podcast called Big Dyke Energy with my friend Rose Blakelock. The first episode is called "You're Speaking My Language." It's free and queer and singular, like me and maybe like you too. Happy Valentine's Day, babes.

Photos by Charles McQuillan/Getty Images

This photo proves that they are the chillest onscreen family

Sophie Turner just posted a photo of herself, Maisie Williams, and Isaac Hempstead Wright—aka the Stark siblings—to her Instagram, showing just what the three used to get up to when the Game of Thrones cameras weren't rolling.

The photo shows Wright looking quite pleased with himself while sitting on a makeshift throne, wearing no pants. As he should be, seeing as (spoiler) his character, Bran, won the Iron Throne this weekend. Williams, meanwhile, is looking way too cool to be involved in the shenanigans, wearing a pair of black sunglasses and staring absently off-camera. As for Turner, she's looking away from her onscreen brother, too, nervously smoking a Juul.

"The pack survived," Turner captioned the photo.

This photo just goes to prove that the Stark siblings are the chillest onscreen family. (It also proves, yet again, that Turner's social media is an absolute delight.)

We're actually a little sad that this footage didn't make it into the final season, considering how many modern-day objects have been spotted in the show's last few episodes.

Photo via @mileycyrus on Twitter

Meet Ashley

Miley Cyrus shared the trailer for her forthcoming Black Mirror episode, and it's basically Hannah Montana set in a dystopian future. Cyrus is a pink wig-wearing pop star named Ashley who is rolling out an in-home virtual assistant, named Ashley Too, that looks like her and shares her voice. But, as is the case with every Black Mirror episode, this technology is not as cute and fun as it's advertised to be.

In the trailer, we get the idea that Ashley is all about wanting fans to "believe" in themselves—but underneath that pink wig, maybe she doesn't feel that same self-love. After Ashley Too introduces herself to fan and new owner Rachel, promising to be her friend, we get a look at Ashley's darker side. She's depressed and tired of the pop star life. A record label executive says to several people in the room, "She doesn't understand how fragile all this is." As they consider upping her dose of medication, Ashley's life is on a downward slope. "It's getting so hard to keep doing this," she voices over glimpses of a police car chase, performances, and breakdowns backstage.

But back to the technology: Does Ashley's breakdown also mean the breakdown of Ashley Too? Looks like it. We see Rachel's virtual assistant screaming, "Get that cable out of my ass! Holy shit! Pull it out," breathing a sigh of relief as soon as they pull it out. A title card then reveals the episode name, "Rachel, Jack, and Ashley Too."

Watch the full trailer and get a full view of Cyrus' cyborg-esque pop star look, below. Black Mirror returns to Netflix on June 5.


Photo by Paras Griffin / Stringer / Getty Images.

Several actresses allegedly had "issues" with him

Lena Waithe's Showtime series, The Chi, just lost one of its main characters. Jason Mitchell, who was also set to appear in the Netflix film Desperados, has been dropped from both projects following multiple allegations of misconduct. He has also been dropped by his agent and manager.

Hollywood Reporter heard from a source "with knowledge" of The Chi, who says that Tiffany Boone, the actress who plays Mitchell's girlfriend on the show, is just one of several actresses who had "issues" with him. She eventually told producers at Fox21 that she could no longer work with him after filing several sexual harassment complaints. Apparently, her fiancé, Dear White People co-star Marque Richardson, would join her on set when she would shoot with Mitchell.

While news of Mitchell's alleged misconduct is just now beginning to surface, it looks like the ball started rolling on the fallout weeks ago. He was dropped from Desperados and replaced by Lamorne Morris before filming began. A source from the production team said that the producers received "specific information" that they reviewed and acted on quickly. Similarly, a source familiar with Mitchell's former agent, UTA, said the decision to drop him a few weeks ago was very quick following the allegations.

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Photo by Rachel Murray/Getty Images

Prior to the college admissions scandal, she said she doesn't "care about school"

Apparently, Olivia Jade wants to go back to school despite all those YouTube videos that suggested otherwise. Back in March, it was revealed that her mom, Fuller House actress Lori Loughlin, and dad, Mossimo Giannulli, had scammed Jade's way into the University of Southern California. Now, Loughlin faces jail time, and Jade lost out on plenty of lucrative ad partnerships.

According to Us Weekly, "Olivia Jade wants to go back to USC," per a source. "She didn't get officially kicked out and she is begging the school to let her back in." Another source though ousted Jade's real motivation to the publication. "She knows they won't let her in, so she's hoping this info gets out," they shared. "She wants to come out looking like she's changed, learned life lessons and is growing as a person, so she for sure wants people to think she is interested in her education."

Jade previously shared in a YouTube video she's in college for the "experience of like game days, partying" rather than the education. She also said, "I don't know how much of school I'm going to attend... I don't really care about school, as you guys all know." Though these statements were made prior to the scandal coming to light, her brand partnerships didn't come into question until her parents were indicted.

Right now, despite previous reports that Jade and her sister would both be dropping out of USC, Jade's enrollment has been placed on hold—meaning she cannot register for classes, or even withdraw from the school—until her parents' court case comes to a close. Then, the school will make its own decision as to how Jade will be affected. I think, either way, she should have to pay off a few of her classmates' loans for all the BS she pulled.

Photo by Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

He'd previously said he wanted to punch Jackson's 'Leaving Neverland' accusers in the face

Aaron Carter has been one of Michael Jackson's fiercest celebrity advocates in the aftermath of the Leaving Neverland documentary in which two men, Wade Robson and James Safechuck, alleged that Jackson sexually abused them when they were children. In a new clip from People, however, he seems to walk back his defense.

People reveals that Carter will be joining the upcoming season of reality TV show Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars Family Edition with his mother. It's noted that he will be revealing more thoughts regarding Jackson following the documentary and the sneak peek specifically sees him alluding to a negative experience with the singer.

Carter, who has previously said that Jackson was never inappropriate toward him, says that Jackson "was a really good guy," though he does note that this is only true "as far as I know." "He never did anything that was inappropriate," he continues before stopping himself, as though remembering something. "Except for one time. There was one thing that he did that was a little bit inappropriate."

Carter does not provide any more detail after this statement. He has previously said that he would stay at Jackson's Neverland estate and sleep in the same bed as the much older star when he was 15 years old, though he hasn't seemed to understand then just how creepy that is. He also said earlier this year, in a clip from TMZ, that he would be telling a story of something that happened between them in an upcoming book about his life.