What To Get Your Valentine, Based On Your Relationship Stage

Photos courtesy of Lush, Maude, Segura Viudas USA, The Night Sky

There's something to give, regardless of the ~situation~

Ah yes, Valentine's Day: Everyone's least favorite holiday until they have someone to celebrate it with... or maybe it's just me who hates love until I am in love.

But, even though I do find myself enjoying the idea of the holiday when I have someone to share it with, I'm still cynical about one aspect of the occasion: the gifts.

Valentine's is a day which has beget tons of mass-produced gifts for the occasion, all bearing the same pre-written messages of love and adoration—and our partners deserve better. We deserve better. Even the simplest of flings deserves more than a heart-shaped box of chocolates from the corner store. If you're with someone, even if you're on a budget, you should get them something more personal.

Here's where I'll be helping you out. Below, find a range of potential gifts for the person in your life, sorted by stage of the relationship. They deserve it.

Photo courtesy of Lush

Whether or not you use it together, a cheeky (pun intended) bath bomb would be a great gift for someone you're with casually. There are also bath bombs shaped like eggplants and bananas in this line, if you're feeling even more suggestive.

Lush, Peachy Bath Bomb, $6.95, available at Lush.

- This slide is sponsored by Segura Viudas -

Wine might feel like a safe gift, but it's really not when you're sharing it with someone with whom you have a fiery connection. We recommend you choose a sparkling wine that will be sure to set off even more sparks between you and your partner. This rosé cava will match perfectly with your bubbly feels—and obviously, pink is the perfect color for the holiday.

Segura Viudas Cava, Segura Viudas Rosé Cava, price varies, available at a store near you.

Photo courtesy of Bubble

This is basically the vegan version of Nutella and is comprised of only three ingredients: hazelnut, coconut sugar, and cacao. You could cuddle up and watch a movie while sharing a jar, or bring it into the bedroom for something less low-key. Your move.

Bubble, Hella, $9, available at Bubble.

Photo courtesy of The Sill

This tiny plant looks like a tiny budding heart, and it could symbolize your budding relationship together (is that cute or what?). They'll think of you when they see it, so you'll never leave their mind. And why should you?

The Sill, Hoya Heart Plant, $26, available at The Sill.

Photo courtesy of Urban Outfitters

Get them a comfy sweatshirt that you know they'll look good in so you can compliment them on it when they wear it. Even better: Steal it and snuggle up in it every time you go to their house.

Urban Outfitters, Burnout Crew-neck Sweatshirt, $54, available at Urban Outfitters.

Photo courtesy of Amazon

Get them a book you love, and it'll make them feel like they know you more. And they will!

The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle by Haruki Murakami, $11.52, available at Amazon.

Hawthorne sells gender-neutral grooming products, and you can customize what you get by filling out a simple quiz. Flex how much you know them already, and get them a personalized set.

Hawthorne, Personalized Subscription Box, price varies, available at Hawthorne.

Photo courtesy of UrbanStems

Sure, sending flowers to work is cute, but they do end up dying. Get a plant delivered instead, so that they can keep it by their desk and think of you year-round.

UrbanStems, The Aphrodite, $85, available at UrbanStems.

Learn more about each other with the help of a spiritually inclined guide. A tarot reading will give you insight into the future of your relationship, and tell you if it was written in the stars. And if it reveals something you don't want to believe, you can choose to ignore it (and work to disprove it) together.

Modern Mystic Shop, Tarot Reading, From $20, available at Modern Mystic Shop.

Photo courtesy of Gamine

This perfume, though a bit on the expensive side, is perfect for everyone (or so I've decided). One bottle of this could be shared by the both of you—and you know it's serious when you share a signature scent.

Gamine, 100 ml Eau de Parfum, $185, available at Gamine.

Maude's boxes let you customize what you get in them, based on your sex life (solo or with a partner). Whether you need condoms, lube, a vibrator, or candles (which is made from oil that, when lit, turns into the perfect massage oil), Maude has you covered. It's a good idea to get for you and your partner, whether you want to spice things up or keep them the same.

Maude, Personalized Kit, price varies, available at Maude.

Photo courtesy of The Night Sky

Want to remember the day you met, or the day you first kissed, or the day you became an item? Now your memory can live on your wall.

The Night Sky, Custom Star Map, from $60, available at The Night Sky.

Photo courtesy of Juvenex Spa

If there's anything that you and your partner deserve, it's a day of relaxation. You're probably past the days of surprising them with flowers and chocolates, so go all in on something rewarding for the both of you. A day full of saunas, baths, and maybe even a massage together sounds just like heaven to me.

Juvenex Spa, Romantic Couples Getaway, starting at $395, available at Juvenex Spa.

Photo courtesy of Artsy

A nice piece of art for your home is a thoughtful gift that would benefit you, too. Get them a statement piece that goes with the vibe of your place to show your love (it doesn't have to be as on-the-nose as the one above).

Charlie Hewitt, Bleeding Heart Woodcut, $450, available at Artsy.

Big getaways are always fun, yes, but staycations are underrated. Go somewhere nice in your own backyard, so you can skip the stress of traveling and scouring the internet for things to do and places to eat.

The Standard East, rooms start at $255/night.

NYLON uses affiliate links and may earn a commission if you purchase something through those links, but every product chosen is selected independently.

Photo by Imani Givertz

Premiering today via NYLON

Small Talks, aka Cayley Spivey, has come a long way since starting a band, then becoming the entire band herself and forging her own fan base from the ground up. On her recent album A Conversation Between Us, she began to unpack any lingering baggage with one particular song: "Teeth." Today, she premieres the accompanying music video exclusively via NYLON.

"'Teeth' is about my personal battle with letting go of the past," Spivey tells NYLON, admitting that it's easily her favorite song off of A Conversation Between Us.

Watch the video for "Teeth" below.

Small Talks - Teeth (Official Music Video) - YouTube

Photos by Joe Maher/Getty Images, Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for TIME

Must have been pretty awkward

Taylor Swift and Sophie Turner were guests on the U.K.'s The Graham Norton Show together, which must have been awkward for Turner's husband, Joe Jonas, seeing as he also happens to be Swift's ex. I wonder if his name came up?

The interview doesn't come out until Friday night, but promotional photos show the two sharing a couch. Swift is making an appearance to perform her new single, "ME!" while Turner is promoting her new film, X- Men: Dark Phoenix. But it seems necessary for the two to be asked about Jonas.

Swift was just on the Ellen DeGeneres Show earlier this month, where she brought up the fact that she felt bad for putting Jonas "on blast" on DeGeneres' show back in 2008 by telling the audience that he broke up with her in a record-setting short phone call. But, according to Swift, she and Jonas are chill now, since it happened pretty long ago, which means she's probably already hung out with Turner and maybe even gossiped about him with her.

We can only hope that they get the chance to spill some tea on television.

Screenshot via YouTube, Photo Courtesy of HBO

"That's! His! Auntie!"

Leslie Jones has rewatched the Game of Thrones finale with a beer in hand, Seth Meyers at her side, and a full camera crew ready to take in all her glorious reactions. Spoilers ahead, but, if you haven't watched last week's episode already, that's kind of on you at this point.

When Jon Snow started to make out with Daenerys, also known as his aunt, only to stab her through the chest moments later, it was emotional whiplash for everyone watching. And, Jones' reactions—both from her first and second viewing—sum it all perfectly.

"That's! His! Auntie! [gagging noises]," Jones says before making an aside about calling the police if her uncle ever tried to do the same. But then the knife goes in, and Jones screams. "Did you see that?!" Jones asks, "Yeah bitch, that's a knife in you." Meyers points out the funniest part of all: "Why are you so upset about someone kissing their aunt but totally fine with someone killing their aunt?" Jones replies, "Because that bitch needed to go," and, well, same.

Other highlights from the comedians' rewatch include comparing Dany's victory speech to a bad improv gig, predicting that their dogs would have less of a reaction to their deaths than Drogon did to his mother's, and more.

Watch all of Jones' reactions from this Late Night clip below.

Game of Jones: Leslie Jones and Seth Watch Game of Thrones' Series Finale

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These lyrics are a lot

Robbie Tripp, aka Curvy Wife Guy, is back with a music video, titled "Chubby Sexy," starring his wife and a trio of models. In it, Tripp raps about his bold choice to find women with an average body size attractive.

The video begins with a series of statements laid over some pool water: "Curves are the new high fashion," "Chubby is the new sexy," "We Out Here." Tripp posits that these queens deserve an anthem, which they do. What they do not deserve is this Cursed Song. As he lists all the names he knows to call them by (thick, thicc, and BBW), one model (who I really, really hope was paid well) squirts some lotion down her cleavage, and Tripp begins dancing.

"My girl chubby sexy/ Call her bonita gordita," Tripp states in his chorus, before going on to compare "big booty meat" to the peach emoji. Another thing he mentions is that his wife can't find a belt that fits her waist, and that's why he calls her James and the Giant Peach. He then tries to dab. Here are some of the other Cursed highlights from his, uh, verses:

Got those Khaleesi curves/ Knows how to dragon slay
She like a dude that's woke/ We like a girl that's weighty
Some say a chubby girl that's risky/ But they ain't met a curvy girl that's frisky
Imma dunk that donk like I'm Andrew Wiggins.
Thick like an Amazon/ Built like Big Ben.

Tripp says one thing in the video that I couldn't agree more with: "She don't need a man." No, she does not. Please run. If you must, watch the entire video, below. Or send it to your nemesis!

Robbie Tripp - Chubby Sexy (Official Music Video)

Photo by Emma McIntyre / Getty Images.

See the promo here

It was bound to happen. The Kadashians and Jenners have committed themselves to letting the cameras roll on their lives, for better or for worse. So if you thought that the Jordyn Woods and Tristan Thompson cheating scandal was off limits, you thought wrong. The trailer for Sunday's episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians was just released, and it involves the famous family working through the fallout of what happened when Woods went to a party at Thompson's house.

The teaser includes the infamous clip of Khloé Kardashian screaming "LIAAAARRRRRR." It's still not explicitly clear who prompted that strong response. She could be responding to Thompson, who clearly isn't always honest. Or she could be reacting to Woods account of the events on Red Table Talk. But the most revealing moment comes when we see Kylie Jenner—who was Woods' best friend before all of this happened—react for the first time.

In a heart-to-heart conversation, momager Kris Jenner says, "For you and Jordyn, it's like a divorce." Kylie only offers this in response: "She fucked up." Based on Woods' version of events—which I'm inclined to believeThompson is the one who fucked up. Still, I'm hoping for some kind of reconciliation between the two longtime friends. Perhaps we'll have to wait until next season for that.

Check out the promo video below.